October 2019 holds more than just spooky stuff and Halloween. Maybe you’re having a bad day, a bad week, a bad month, maybe even a bad year. Perhaps you’re not feeling like yourself and haven’t for quite some time. Maybe you have everything to be grateful for but are having a hard time finding even a little bit of joy in your everyday life. When is it more than just a bad mood or a bad day?
Suicide Awareness & Prevention is something that I am passionate about. I understand how it feels to want to give up and end it all when you can’t take the pain any longer; I am a suicide attempt survivor. I shouldn’t be here today, but I am glad that I am despite the obstacles and challenges that I still face in my everyday life. I would have missed so much if I had succeeded. I understand how hard life can be sometimes. If I can pull through, so can anyone else who is going through it right now. Just know that YOU ARE NOT ALONE. YOU ARE NOT A BURDEN. YOU ARE LOVED.
Photo by Jules D. on Unsplash Toxic Positivity: What Is It? Toxic positivity is, in a sense, pushing for someone to change their current mental state by telling them things like, “You’ll get over it,” or even, “Just be positive!” Little phrases like those two examples are usually meant to be […]
What goes up, must come down can easily define Bipolar Disorder. Meaning, after every high — or manic episode — a low is sure to follow.
Early Morning Thoughts: March 2, 2019 I am writing this from the comfort of my bed via my smartphone. So, please don’t mind any spelling or grammar errors that you may come by. As I am writing this, it is almost 7 in the morning. My alarm is […]
A Waste of Space I have not been feeling like myself since last night, and trying to find joy in anything today is challenging. I feel like a complete waste of space. I cannot afford to take care of myself right now, and I know others are getting […]
What are triggers? This is a very good question in a time when everyone is talking about how they are so triggered by this that and the other. Triggers are things that you have learned that may cause you distress. They can be anything from a word, event, place, date, even a person them self can be a trigger.
“I have come face to face with the devil more times than I can count. I have lived life as an addict, and I have loved an addict, and I have been in love with addicts. Being pulled from both sides is so hard considering you have lived both loves. I honestly think that loving an addict is much harder than being an addict.” – Kayl (Continue Reading…)
Yesterday was an excellent day for me. I was and still am in a very good mood. Yet, part of me is worried that this feeling is going to crash at any minute and my depression will return. But I am trying to not think like that because I want to really enjoy this happy feeling. It is also slightly euphoric. I am not sure if it is getting ready to turn into a manic episode. Who knows, maybe it is already one! (Continue Reading…)
It’s a gloomy, rainy Tuesday in November. The sky is completely gray, and I kind of like it that way. I am not a sunshine-loving person – most of the time. I woke up around 6:30 a.m. and was hoping to be able to catch the sunrise in order to get some beautiful pictures – even though I am not fond of the sun – but with the clouds so gray there was no sunlight shining through
Baseline I have been pretty much baseline the past few days. Not really elevated, but not really depressed either. I am just existing. I suppose baseline is considered to be stable. Although, with how chaotic my mind sometimes gets, I don’t necessarily feel like the most stable woman […]
If you are in recovery and are worried about attending a holiday party, I can offer you some advice and tips on how I got through it. I am not telling you that you are going to feel comfortable being around your drug of choice and that it is going to be all sunshine and cupcakes, but that doesn’t mean that you have to relapse either. I do not advise anyone in early recovery to put themselves in the same situation that I was in, either. If you don’t have to go to a party just yet, then don’t go. It is so much easier to sit at home and be sober than it is to be around everyone having fun with a drink in their hand.
Hopelessly Bipolar My Manic Madness only lasted about three days, but that doesn’t necessarily make it any less painful. At first, I loved the manic episode I was in. I had the typical euphoric feelings commonly associated with bipolar mania. However, after the first day, it started to […]
It’s a long story you see… I started abusing drugs around the time I was 13 but I truly didn’t become addicted until I was 16. I spent years in and out of rehab and jail really seeing no end to addiction. I was fully convinced I was going to die by the age of 25. I was perfectly okay with that really. I never had ambition or dreams. I thought the only thing I was capable of was being a drug addict. I liked that life as sad as it sounds. It was one thing I was good at. Being a drug addict. It wasn’t until 3 1/2 years ago when I just knew I needed more out of life. Continue Reading…
Alone In A Crowded World Have you ever felt like you are not even a part of this world? Like you are on the outside looking in? Have you ever felt so alone even when being surrounded by others? This is something I had lived with much of […]
I know May of 2019 is still a while away, but I found out through Facebook that The 4th Annual Lehigh Valley Mental Health Awareness Walk will be on May 3, 2019, from 9am – 2pm. The Lehigh Valley is in Pennsylvania and I am looking to get a group of people together to walk for this amazing cause that I am highly supportive of. Mental Health Awareness and helping others is the whole reason behind My Bipolar Mind.
I had gotten a message on Facebook from a young neighbor that used to live across the hall from me last night. She is only 18-years-old and she was in a lot of distress. She was telling me how horrible living was for her, and that she was planning on killing herself.
Photo by Ryan Whitlow on Unsplash What It Feels Like To Have A Panic Attack Panic attacks can feel incredibly different for everyone, yet very similar at the same time. They can be very scary, especially during your first experience dealing with one. I know the first time I had my […]
Late Night Ramblings…
Sometimes when we are feeling down, all we need is one person to tell us that they love us.