C’est la vie! I can’t control the cards that I have been dealt, just like I can’t control how other people act or think. I am trying to make the best of a bad situation. The best of a few bad situations, actually. Sometimes I feel like it’s one blow after another. I am doing the best that I can with what I have and I am finally okay with not being okay most days…
My life is a complete mess right now. My 7-year relationship just came to an end a few days ago. Sometimes I am hurting a lot, other times I feel completely happy and free.
Welcome back to the 2019 Selfie Love Challenge hosted by myself here at My Bipolar Mind and the lovely Kelly over at Budding Joy. Be sure to check out Kelly’s blog and follow her to stay up to date on the #SelfieLove2019 Challenge. Also, if you are not a follower of My Bipolar Mind, please be sure to follow us as well! Today is Saturday, February 23, 2019. It is never too late to jump into this self-love/self-care challenge. If you haven’t been following along or just came across this challenge now,
“I have come face to face with the devil more times than I can count. I have lived life as an addict, and I have loved an addict, and I have been in love with addicts. Being pulled from both sides is so hard considering you have lived both loves. I honestly think that loving an addict is much harder than being an addict.” – Kayl (Continue Reading…)
What is verbal abuse? Can you define it? I myself have fallen victim to it and believed everything to be true. Verbal abuse is not only words used to belittle and hurt; it’s also used to control and manipulate. (Continue Reading…)
It is currently a little after 8:30 in the morning and the bestie, Jazmine, and I have been hanging out all night and just talking about anything and everything under the sun. She was supposed to go to work today but instead is taking a much needed day off. It’s been a long time since we last stayed up all night together just talking. I wouldn’t have it any other way, though.
Okay, so, I am not literally counting sheep until I fall asleep, but you get the gist.
It is about 12:30 am and I am slowly getting drowsy – most likely thanks to the 300mg of Trazodone that I take at night – but my mind is running a thousand miles a minute. I figured I would take this opportunity to blog a bit.
It’s not often that I find myself waking up with energy while in a great mood. So, I figured I would switch it up and make a post while my depression is suppressed for this moment in time. I want to savor this moment and place it safely in my memory – hopefully in a place where I will remember it 😀 – so that when I am feeling down I can pull this memory out and know that sometimes things are okay.
I apologize, once again, for being MIA, but for some reason, I have not been able to write anything – no blog posts, no articles, not one damn thing – and it is driving me absolutely insane! I am a writer and a blogger so writing is what I do. I would also like to add that I am also going to be a published author in the near future!
Today, I went for my echocardiogram and to get my 48-hour Holter monitor put on.
For people who have never attended group therapy, it can sometimes sound a bit scary. But there any many benefits!
Right now, I hate being bipolar.
Is this ever going to get an easier for me? Will I ever stop longing for, and missing the people that hate me the most right now?
I keep bouncing in between feeling hurt and sad to feeling extremely angry regarding the current predicament that I find myself in.
Can I just start over? Make a fresh start, and forget everything that has happened to me since August.
“…Seriously though, I really do hate everything about you. As much as I hate you though, I feel obligated to love you.”