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Tag: My Personal Life

Feeling Amazing

Once again I have fallen behind on posting, but Samantha always gives me friendly reminders. I was so tired, but after my shower I didn’t feel tired anymore so I figured now would be a good time to post. There’s so much racing through my mind the past […]

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I’m Back

It’s been a while since my last post, a long while. As some of you may know, my kids father passed away and then I got a promotion to supervisor. It’s been very hectic lately and I think I’ve become depressed. Most days I don’t want to go […]

Reoccurring Dreams

Have you ever had a reoccurring dream? Reoccurring dreams are dreams that are about the same exact thing or very similar dreams. These dreams can be delightful or they can be terrifying nightmares. Some people believe dreams have no meaning. There’s not much scientific proof regarding dreams, so […]

Feeling Fantastic

They say you can be anything you want to be as long as you put your mind to it. I do believe that to a certain extent. Many people want to be millionaires, but as we all know, that doesn’t happen for everyone. I do believe if we […]

New Promotion

Just about everyday is a hectic day for me. I have four children, which keeps me on my toes constantly. I have been working in a group home for a little over four years. For the last two years, I have been a senior staff, which is similar […]

Where Do I Go From Here

Becoming a writer has forced me to explore feelings and emotions that I have locked away many years ago. I didn’t have an easy childhood. I had so many bad things that happened to me as a child that it became normal to me, but I knew deep […]

Completely Heartbroken

  Completely Heartbroken 💔 I’m drowning again, only this time I have a legitimate reason for being pulled under the water this time around. Sometime this morning when Mike, my boyfriend, wakes up he is going to be calling his dad to try to have him help find […]

Early Morning Anxiety

I just seem to be feeling overly anxious at the moment, and I only just woke up less than an hour ago. I cannot get my mind to just stop running wild. Today I will be getting my first paycheck from Babygaga. It still feels kind of unreal to […]

The Adventure Begins

  The Adventure Begins I am finally getting back to normal, and I love it! I was in such a bad spot with that depressive episode. Sleep was impossible, but that was all I wanted to do. I couldn’t sleep because my mind would not stop racing with […]

Thinking About Life: July 11, 2017

After careful consideration, I have decided to quit my ghostwriting job. It just was not worth it anymore. I sent them an email about it and their only response back was literally, “Oh, wow!” and I have not heard anything since. I was so nervous when I did it.

July 4th, 2017

Today has been pretty good for me while also marking my first 4th of July Sober. But I managed to make it through with of too much of an issue. I did not even get my a** to a meeting like I should have. Then again, I also did not get any sleep like I should have… I have not been to bed yet and I tried everything I could think of, besides illegal stuff and drugs and alcohol, to get me to sleep but to no avail.

Ghostwriter Blues

  Ghostwriter Blues When I agreed to become a ghostwriter I didn’t realize that I would take it so hard once I started seeing another author take claim for all of my hard work. It’s that simple. The other day, I don’t know why, but I decided to […]

Sea Isle City ’17: Day 6

  Sea Isle City 2017: Day 6 (Thursday) For the first time since I have been on vacation, I did not isolate… at least fully. I spent some time working on my one article, even though my focus was horrific for some reason today. I just could not […]

Sea Isle City ’17: Day 5

Sea Isle City 2017: Day 5 (Wednesday) I am absolutely mentally exhausted. On top of my normal 6 articles a week, I had to do an extra 2 more due to another writer having an emergency. These articles should have been so simple, but they were in a […]

Sea Isle City ’17: Day 3

Today was a pretty bland day for me. I don’t think I really left the beach house we were staying at, except for stopping and picking up pizza. I really isolated today. In my defense though, the weather was pretty crappy. It was windy and cloudy. I was […]

Sea Isle City ’17: Day 2

Since I am using writing as my main coping mechanism for my mental health and addiction issues, I have come to the conclusion that it is probably in my best interest to try to add at least one blog post daily. Blogging, and writing in general, are very […]

June 17, 2017 S.I.C., NJ

I guess it’s safe to say I made it to my destination without much of an issue. I wish I could say I have been having the time of my life since I’ve gotten here, but that would be an outright lie. I mean, don’t get me wrong, […]

The Bottle Took Her

I feel kind of ridiculous now for posting about how going on vacation is going to be hard for me because of much I am going to want to drink. I mean, don’t get me wrong, it still rings true. However, I found out this afternoon that my […]

June 16, 2017 2:53am

I should be excited right now since I leave for vacation Saturday morning, but the closer it gets the more anxious I start to feel. This is going to my first vacation sober. I don’t know how well I am going to be able to handle that, especially […]

June 11th – 2:30 am

I haven’t really been able to add many posts or updates recently even though I’ve really been meaning too. I’ve just had a lot going on lately, so I figured that while I was awake at 2:30 am I would finally post my first update in a while.

My First Month Sober

My First Month Sober By: Samantha Steiner My last drink was around 11 PM on Saturday, April 8th, 2017. I was drinking with a girl that I conceded to be my best friend of almost 20 years and two of her cousins. Some stuff went down and we […]