Merry Christmas Eve I have spent days now typing up blog post after post and deleting it or never finishing it. I have been doing the same with journal entries; writing them and then ripping them out. The same with article and… Read More ›
Christmas is a little over a week away. I still have some gift shopping to do. I am going to try my hardest to enjoy Christmas since that has always been my favorite holiday.
NF – Let You Down Music Video – YouTube
I just kept thinking about Max and about how much I really miss the little guy.
Every time things start to look up something always has to go wrong.
I know that things can get better if I continue to hang on to whatever I can to keep myself alive.
Despite having ups, I am still having a lot of downs and last night I just started to feel completely defeated by life.
Lyrics and Official Music video for Logic’s song, “1-800-273-8255.
I am still wondering if I will ever get over the chaos that certain people instilled in me.
Between my family ditching me and then stealing my dog, the m/c, my mom putting my childhood dog down without them telling me or even asking me if I wanted to see him one last time, and everything else, I don’t want to do this anymore; I don’t know if I am strong enough to be able to do this anymore. But I guess I have to be.
What do I do from here?
This is procrastination at it’s finest.
Information about mixed episodes for a person with bipolar disorder and the greatest risk is for someone in a mixed episode.
I am always looking at the negatives and tend to overlook the positives.
I can’t believe everything that I have been through this year. It’s so surreal. Trying to think back to everything that’s happened feels hazy. Like I cannot even trust my own perception of time.
This is my family, the people who are supposed to love me unconditionally obviously love me conditionally or no longer love me at all, in general.
This is a bittersweet tragedy. I gained back what I wanted, which was my life back, but I ended up losing something in the process. One step forward, two steps back.