I finally feel like I am on the right medication combination for my mental health disorders. It took 20 years of trial and error and getting prescribed more medications than I can even remember to get where I am today. I honestly felt like I’d never get to the point where I am okay on all my meds without any major side effects.
Bipolar Disorder Awareness
Before we get into the main topic at hand, let’s first learn a little bit about Bipolar Disorder. Bipolar Disorder is characterized by extreme highs – known as mania – and extreme lows – known as bipolar depression. There are different types of Bipolar Disorder but the main two are labeled as Bipolar 1 and Bipolar 2.
I hope that everyone who celebrates Thanksgiving has an amazing day Thursday filled with lots of thanks, gratitude, love, and the chance to be surrounded by those you cherish the most.
For those of you who are like me and are living with bipolar disorder, you have probably been told about the importance of tracking your mood and bipolar symptoms regularly at least once or twice in your life. Tracking your mood and symptoms has quite a few benefits. (Get your free printable and continue reading)
I am not really feeling any better than I was last night when I wrote about being in an agitated, anxiety-fueled bipolar manic episode. If anything, I feel worse than I did yesterday. Perhaps this is because, like I anticipated, I did not get any sleep or rest last night. Instead, I manically wrote for hours on end. I didn’t even notice when nighttime turned into daylight.
Usually, I look forward to manic episodes as long as they are the happy, fun-loving, euphoric types of mania. But we don’t always get what we want, do we?
I am so excited to announce the release of my second book in the My Bipolar Mind series: My Bipolar Mind: Surviving the Chaos.
I am ecstatic right now! Today, April 18th, 2020, I found out that the re-release of my memoir “My Bipolar Mind” has made the #1 New Release spot on Amazon for Bipolar Disorder!
“My Bipolar Mind” is NOW available on Amazon (again!)
If you have a friend or a loved one who struggles with their mental health it is always a good idea to research your loved one’s diagnosis in order to understand them and what they are going through better. Sometimes people who don’t really understand what is going on inside of their loved one’s head can say or do certain things that were meant out of kindness but actually do more harm than good.
Coming down from a manic episode can be different for everyone. We’re all unique in how our bodies and minds are made up. But for me, when I am coming down from a manic episode, it is almost comparable to coming down from a drug or alcohol high because that is exactly what our minds and bodies are doing; coming down from an emotional high.
Sleep has eluded me all night and I’m starting to get a massive migraine from being overly tired and not being able to give into the sandman’s’ sweet embrace. I just want to sleep! Especially with how erratic my moods have been lately; sleep should come naturally and offer me even a slight bit of relief but it’s not.
It’s hard to believe it’s already almost mid-December. The year feels like it has just flown by. Some days do seem to go by faster than others, but as a whole — the year went pretty fast.
When you Google the meaning of overwhelmed one of the definitions is: “Defeat completely.” And completely defeated can perfectly go to describe how I have been feeling at times.
Doctors don’t completely understand the causes of bipolar. Its symptoms include having the elated highs of mania to the lows of major depression, along with various mood states between. These extremes in mood are called “episodes”. Or as I like to call them, “temporary insanity.”
My mood is all over the place right now. I think I am in a mixed bipolar episode. These episodes can really be the worst. It feels like there is two or three of me arguing inside of my head. It’s like there is a f***ing battle going on in my mind. I can’t stand it!
So, random thought from last night… I was working on a blog post — that I never finished — and it was titled “3am Thoughts,” and I couldn’t figure out what time “late night” transitioned into “early morning” so I settled on just saying “3am.” I probably spent way too much time being consumed by this question than I should have. And I didn’t necessarily feel like resorting to using Google to solve yet another debate for me. If you think that this a strange thing to be consumed by, you would not want to know about the rest of the crap that gets stuck inside my head!
I feel like it has been a long, exhausting day when I hardly did anything today but attended a doctor appointment, make phone calls, and went to Dunkin’ Donuts. I am still in tremendous amounts of pain, especially a few of my teeth that need dental work done. Both sides of my mouth hurt and I am in a great deal of pain during and after eating almost anything.
Last night when I went to bed, I just had this gut feeling that I was not going to be feeling well the following day. Sure enough, I was right. I woke up feeling sick as all hell. I am a massive drama queen when I get sick. Although, I am nowhere near as bad as when a man gets sick! Sorry, fellas, but it is so true. Most guys act like they are literally dying when they just get the common cold! I feel too awake to rest, but yet feeling slightly fatigued at the same time. I didn’t know you could really have one without the other.