Hi, my name is Jessenia Collado and I go by Jess. I am 34 years old. I want to share some of my stories on my friend Samantha’s blog. I hope to help people by sharing my story. When I was 22 years old I had my first suicidal attempt. I was taken to the hospital and given a charcoal drink and sent home without a psychological evaluation. After this, I lived my life without having major depression. Until 2018, This was when I first had a psychological evaluation and was admitted to the psych ward in New Jersey.
Upon my stay in the psych ward, I was diagnosed with depression. I was put on Lexapro and felt amazing by the second day of taking it. I had a good 6 weeks and went back into a depressive state and started feeling suicidal again. This started to become almost a weekly thing, I was in the psych ward weekly and held for 2 to 3 days and discharged with no therapy and with different depression medications each time. Each time they tried a different medication for depression I would feel worse.
At the end of 2019, my psychiatrist decided to try a mood stabilizer. I didn’t think anything of it and she didn’t tell me why she was prescribing it. A few weeks in I began to feel much better. The next time I met with her she asked me how I was doing and I said I was feeling great for 6 weeks straight. She then told me she was diagnosing me with Bipolar disorder. I was shocked, scared, and confused. She also diagnosed me with major depressive disorder and Borderline personality disorder. Also as of most recently, I was diagnosed with Anxiety.
It has been about 2 and a half years since my diagnosis and I still have not figured out what any of my triggers are. I have not found any coping skills except for alcohol. I also don’t have a support system. So join me in sharing some of my childhood traumas, stories of all of my psych ward visits, and suicidal attempts on my life. I also want to share my journey of finding out what my triggers are and finding healthy coping skills.