Sincerely, An Extremely Anxious Woman
Guest Post by Kayl
If I could pick one thing I hated about myself it would have to be my anxiety. Anxiety makes me become someone who I am not. Anxiety makes me mean and harsh and sometimes not care, especially towards the people I love. Which has nothing to do with them. You know it’s you but you don’t want to admit it. Then we you do admit it, it’s just “an excuse.”
I overthink, A LOT. Mostly about things that are out of my control. I over analyze every single situation. I make situations up in my mind. I replay situations in my mind coming up with different outcomes but it’s already too late. Like what I should have said or done different.
I can’t go do certain things on my own like going to a store. My anxiety stops me from being a normal person and doing normal things. If i’ve never been somewhere before, I can’t go there alone; someone needs to come with me.
I need a lot of my own space. And I like to be alone a lot. Anxiety makes me antisocial and I hate being in public. I truly don’t think people that dont have such severe anxiety will ever understand. I don’t mean to be this way but this is who I am. People lack understanding towards people with mental illnesses.
Like I said earlier, we just use it as “an excuse;” Most of the time I wish it was an excuse. I don’t want to be this person. But I am who I am.
If you know someone or love someone with a mental illness, take time to understand them. Know their faults. Just little things can make their illness a little bit more easier. We struggle hard and sometimes we just need a little understanding. It’s NOT our fault.
An extremely anxious woman.
Samantha is the author of "My Bipolar Mind: You're not alone," she is also a freelance writer, blogger, and mental health advocate who runs and manages her own mental health blog MyBipolarMind.com.