Happy Easter 🐰
I want to wish everyone a Happy Easter! If you celebrate, I hope that you are able to spend some time with your loved ones. To those of you who are spending the holiday solo, that is okay too, but always remember that you are loved and that there is nothing wrong with being alone on the holidays. Spend the entire day doing the things that you love – choirs can wait until tomorrow.
My boyfriend and I have to be at my mom’s new house by 2 pm so we can help her finish cooking since we have the rest of the food for dinner. Then, we are scheduled to eat around 3 pm. Sometime after that, we have to go to my boyfriend’s parents house for their dinner. I have a good feeling that I am going to overeat today haha.
I am in a pretty good mood today despite having some cravings for alcohol, which I guess can be normal in early sobriety given that it is a holiday. I will be 20 months sober from alcohol on April 27th. I can’t believe that in just a little over four months I will be two years sober.
I can’t believe that I have made it this far. I’d be lying if I said I didn’t miss drinking sometimes. What really sucks is the fact that I know I will have cravings to drink for the rest of my life. My dad is proof of that because he is 20 years sober and he still has a hard time with cravings if he is around it or even sees bottles of alcohol. But like I said, despite all that, I am in a pretty good mood.
I don’t want to leave Jasper alone all day, but I kind of have to. It would be nice if I could bring him with me but I know I can’t. I hope he will be okay. I still have a bit of anxiety and paranoia when I leave him alone and I worry that something is going to happen to him or that he will get hurt.
I love this kitty so much already. He got to my heart. He is such a good boy even though he seems to get into everything. But I don’t mind, especially since he was so close to death just like two weeks ago. Jasper is doing so much better. He is back to his old self and then some.
He is so different from Buddy. He is very playful and likes being held. He is my little monkey too as you can see from the picture I added.
I am happy to spend some of Easter with my mom. My three siblings on her side all have to work and I didn’t want my mom to spend Easter alone. She deserves to have someone who loves her with her. She is my mom after all. I let all the bad blood that was between us slip away. It was time to let go of that resentment and I feel much lighter than I did. I still have a lot of stuff weighing me down, but at least this was put to rest and I am not dragging it around with me anymore.
Well, I need to get some writing down before I start to get ready to leave. It is 10:45 am and I am still in the clothes I slept in.
Have a safe and Happy Easter, everyone! From all of us here at My Bipolar Mind!!
Samantha is the author of "My Bipolar Mind: You're not alone," she is also a freelance writer, blogger, and mental health advocate who runs and manages her own mental health blog MyBipolarMind.com.